#DearChronicles Vol. 02 – “When to Get Selfish?”

Dear Chronicles, 

By Amiera Syuhada


How often do you hear students say that all they want to do is to make their parents proud? Of course that’s a dream for most, but what are you supposed to achieve in life, in order for them to be proud? Is it by becoming an accountant, because your family members are accountants? Or is it just by merely excelling in things you love doing?

I’d say it is important to know what you actually want to do in life and follow your own dreams because what your parents may think is the best for you, might not be the very best. Most parents just want the best for their kids but if you don’t speak up, they will never know; be it the things you want to pursue in life or your choice of a lifelong partner.

We often hear ‘mothers know best’ but honestly speaking, do you think it’s true? Perhaps it was true when we were younger, when all we did was hanging out with our family. However, as we grow older, most of our time is spent with friends and away from home. Do you think your parents still know you best? So many things about you can change, from your favourite food to your passion and hobbies. So what makes you think that other things about you haven’t changed?

You could be the one who got yourself into whatever you’re doing now but we are humans, and humans do change their minds. If what you are doing right now is solely to please your parents but is not making you happy, take a step back and think, “Do I actually want this?”. Because at the end of the day, you are the one who are going to live with your decisions for the rest of your life. Are you willing to be unhappy just because you want to hear your parents say “I’m proud of you?”

Once you’re feeling unhappy doing something, that’s when you know you need to start being selfish. Speak up about your dreams, make them believe in it as much as you do. If they don’t, and they are forcing you to take the route they’ve already planned for you, then you’ve got to make a choice; your happiness or your parents’ happiness?

My opinion on this is you gotta be selfish. Choose your happiness before anyone else’s. You are the one who is going to live your life, not them. I can assure you if your parents disagree now, they will still be proud of you when they see you succeed in the field of your choice because at the end of the day, all they want to see is your success and your ability to live on your own without them supporting you because they know someday they might not be there for you.

So don’t take it the wrong way when your parents force you to study ACCA or to marry a person of their choice, all they want is the best for you. But no one really knows you more than you know yourself. If you feel like their choice is not right for you, speak up and let them know. Do what feels right for you even if that makes you a little bit selfish.

 

Editor’s Note: On behalf of IM Crew, we would like to express our condolences to Amiera Syuhada and her family on the recent passing of her father. Al-fatihah.


 

#DearChronicles is a new column introduced to invite our readers, whoever you may be, to write, share and inspire!

Submit your writings to imcrew14@gmail.com.
For any enquiries, please contact Adibah Faizal – 016 774 4431

 

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